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- 2021-05-20 发布
2018届 二轮复习 书面表达中亮点句式润色的七大原则
作文要想得高分，必须要有吸引阅卷老师眼球的亮点。如何打造亮点句式呢？大家可以遵循以下七个原则。
原则一：新颖性
改掉句中的俗词，或合理调整句子语序，都有助于提升句子的新颖性。新颖的句子能为评卷者在评卷过程中带来良性体验，能有效提升作文表达和分值。
1．变换用词
行文时，既要避免使用俗词，又要避开冷僻词汇。
(1) I definitely believe that bad words really have bad influence on us, and that only with a good understanding of them can we get through and get along well.
→I am definitely convinced that bad words really have bad influence on us, and that only with a good understanding of them can we get through and get along well.
(2013·湖北高考满分作文)
(2)Moreover, I will open more channels for you to speak out your opinions and need.
→Moreover, I will open more channels for you to voice your opinions and need.(2013·天津高考书面表达)
另外，我会开发更多渠道，让你们说出观点和需求。
(3)I believe very much that a wise choice leads to perfection.
→I am pretty convinced that a wise choice leads to
perfection.(2013·上海高考满分作文)
我非常相信，英明的选择会通向完美。
2．变换语序
适当变换语序也有助于提高句子新颖性。在评卷过程中，倒装句、插入语等非正常语序形式都能让评卷人眼前一亮。
(1)We can better ourselves in the future only by focusing more on correcting our mistakes.
→Only by focusing more on correcting our mistakes can we better ourselves in the future.(2013·湖南高考满分作文)
我们只有通过不断改正错误才能使我们自己在未来变得更好。
(2)I guess you must have had no end of trouble.
→You must have had no end of trouble, I guess.
我想你一定经历过无数的困难。
[即时演练] 用变换用词或语序的方式增加新颖性
1．We should remember that hard work leads to success.
→We should bear_in_mind that hard work leads to success.
2．Recycled bags are better than plastic bags in environment protecting.
→Recycled bags are_superior_to/have_advantages_over plastic bags in environment protecting.
3．The days when we Chinese people were looked down upon are gone.
→Gone_are_the_days when we Chinese people were looked down upon.
4．A beautiful smile can not only make ourselves happy, but also enable others to be delighted.
→Not_only_can_a_beautiful_smile_make ourselves happy, but also enable others to be delighted.
原则二：具体性
在具备一定词汇量的条件下，具体的表达比泛泛而谈的内容更能引起读者的共鸣。换句话说，写作需要“真善美”，尽量避免“假大空”。
1．My friend is fixing the car.
→My friend, Leon, is fixing his 12yearold Santana.
2．I saw my classmate studying in the classroom.
→I saw my naughty but lovely classmate studying in the classroom.
[即时演练] 用“具体性原则”把“假大空版”改为“真善美版”
写作要求：学校要举行一场题为“Turning a bad mood into a good one”的英语作文比赛，要求你写一篇文章，其中一个要点是如何调整心情。
假大空版：Keeping a good mood is of great importance. When you feel angry or anxious, calm down. It is useless losing a temper and we should always make ourselves happy.
真善美版：We_should_learn_to_keep_a_good_mood._Communicating_with_family_members_or_friends_is_the_best_choice._Also_listening_to_some_peaceful_music_can_be_helpful._Reading_is_another_way_to_stop_being_mad.
原则三：简洁性
写作过程中，不必为了增添字数而采用冗余表达。给评分者带来好感的不是字数，而是简洁明了、条理清晰的语句。
1．His brother, who is a tourist guide, will help us plan this trip.
→His brother, a tourist guide, will help us plan this trip.
2．They found the answer to be quite satisfactory.
→They found the answer quite satisfactory.
[即时演练] 用“简洁性原则”简化下面的句子
1．The friendship that is based on profits won’t last long.
The_friendship_based_on_profits_won’t_last_long.
2．They consider Paris to be the brain and heart of the country.
They_consider_Paris_the_brain_and_heart_of_the_country.
原则四：紧凑性
作文中难免用到短句，但如果短句太多，会使人感到段落过于零散。因此需要将过多的短句整合成紧凑的句子。
Most tourist attractions in China are littered. This lake is the worst.
→Most tourist attractions in China are littered, the worst of which is this lake.
→Most tourist attractions in China are littered, with this lake being the worst.
[即时演练] 用“紧凑性原则”整合下面的句子
1．He is our English teacher. His name is Wang Bin. He has taught us for two years.
Wang_Bin,_our_English_teacher,_has_taught_us_for_two_years.
2．They finished repairing the broken chair together. They felt very happy.
How_happy_they_felt_after_they_finished_repairing_the_broken_chair_together!
原则五：逻辑性
汉语重语义，英语重逻辑。在写作中如果通过逻辑表达自己的观点、取舍、好恶等信息，这样的句子会博得评卷者的青睐。
1．To put this problem to an end, we must follow these steps.
→To put this problem to an end, we have no alternative but to follow these steps.
2．The love of a man who lays down his life for his friends is the greatest love.
→There is no greater love than that of a man who lays down his life for his friends.
[即时演练] 用“逻辑性原则”改写下面的句子
1．Mr. Stevenson is great to work for — he is really the best boss for me to ask for.
Mr._Stevenson_is_great_to_work_for_—_I_really_couldn’t_ask_for_a_better_boss.
2．Being addicted to computer games can most affect the study of a student.
Nothing_can_affect_the_study_of_a_student_as_greatly_as_being_addicted_to_computer_games.
原则六：互动性
写作是与读者互动的一个过程。在写作中，作者可以通过适当发问来引导读者对论题逐渐深入了解。
Which is more important, wealth or health?
财富和健康，哪个更重要？
Which is better, a telephone call or a letter?
打电话还是写信，哪个更好？
Should students make friends on line?
学生应该网上交友吗？
[即时演练] 用“互动性原则”改写下列句子
1．We should take the following measures to solve the problem.
Any_solutions?_How_about_taking_the_following_measures?
2．As to whether the private car drivers shall be charged congestion fees, opinions are divided.
Shall_the_private_car_drivers_be_charged_congestion_fees?_Opinions_are_divided_on_this_matter.
原则七：优雅性
运用简单的修辞，可增加句子的优雅性。有些同学可能会感觉太难，但简单易行的修辞方法我们在阅读过程中随处可见，只是我们只顾做题，从未领会过文章中的生花妙笔。
In order to get her to recover as soon as possible, I took good care of her by helping her take some medicine, putting cold towel on her forehead, preparing her meals, etc.(2013·北京高考满分作文)
为了让她尽快恢复，我细心照顾她，帮她服药、把冷毛巾放在她的额头上、为她做饭等。(排比)
One who teaches morality but practices immorality is a wolf in a sheep’s skin.
满口仁义道德，一肚子男盗女娼的人就是披着羊皮的狼。(比喻)
[即时演练] 用“优雅性原则”翻译下列句子
1．要求这位秘书写报告时要快速、准确、全面。(排比)
The_secretary_was_asked_to_write_the_report_quickly,_accurately_and_throughly.
2．老师说他是个差生，因为他要等到考试时才学习、做作业漫不经心、而且缺乏学习动力。(排比)
The_teacher_said_that_he_was_a_poor_student_because_he_waited_until_the_last_minute_to_study_for_the_exam,_completed_his_homework_in_a_careless_way,_and_lacked_motivation._
3．世界就是个舞台，所有的男人和女人都是演员。(比喻)
The_whole_world_is_a_stage._All_men_and_women_are_merely_players._
4．自我批评的重要性就如同空气和水一样。(比喻)
Selfcriticism_is_as_important_to_us_as_air_and_water.